Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Tear My Heart Open, Sew Myself Shut

Lately I've been thinking about the challenges of growing up. Several of the teens I mentored are now in their twenties and it's interesting seeing them go through the same things I went through five years ago, and still struggle with today. Balancing old relationships and new ones. Becoming more independent. Realizing sometimes you have to let go of things to make room for new ones. 

I don't have life figured out. And whenever I think I do, something crazy comes along and reminds me I'm still learning. I'm still trying to hold on to parts of my past - hurts, joys, and people - and I'm not convinced that's a bad thing. At least the joys and people part. 

What I'm starting to realize is I'm holding on to some of those things/people so tight that they're suffering. The relationships aren't growing because I'm not allowing them to mature. I'm so possessive of them that everything is seen as a threat. That's not healthy, nor mature. 

Yeah, I've still got a lot to learn.

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